The Extraordinary Power of Talking for Your Ultimate Health Part 1
The Extraordinary Power of Talking for Your Ultimate Health
If you don’t know me already, I’m Leila Hardy. I am your online holistic health and life coach! I love nothing more than combining the subconscious and energy together to create incredible, long lasting transformational change with your health, your wealth, your happiness, and your success. I do that using Rapid Transformational Therapy, Hypnotherapy, Rapid Transformational Coaching, Energy Healing and clearing alongside meditations, visualisations, and adding in the nutritional and fitness piece, if need be.
In this post, we are talking about the extraordinary power of talking. I use the term talking slightly loosely in that it’s just being honest; just being authentic. That could also be in the written word as well.
But I think it’s key to talk about this. It comes up a lot. It has come up for me personally, but it also comes up a lot for people that I speak to and just friends and people that I observe around in my world as well where there maybe isn’t enough honest talking and communication that goes on.
As a result, people are struggling with trapped emotions, trapped and blocked energy. They tend to take the whole world on their shoulders which means we carry a lot of emotional and mental and physical weight as a result of that. It creates a lot of knock-on effects that actually can be reduced and helped massively if we are able to express ourselves in a really authentic, genuine, honest, and truthful way. That means not just celebrating all the wins and the celebrations and the great things, but actually being able to honestly and constructively talk about what’s going on for you that doesn’t feel so good.
I think talking is underrated.
We think that we are moaning by sharing our problems and sharing the things that we find difficult. As a result of feeling like we don’t want to pull people down or don’t want to be negative, we don’t do it at all which means it stays stuck inside of us which is not healthy at all.
We need to be able to express every range of that spectrum of emotions because then it allows us with that permission to be able to do it. To let them come up without the extremes that they come up with when they’ve been bottled up inside.
A lot of people think moaning is a bad thing. They think it’s a negative thing and they shouldn’t be doing it.
The only thing I’m going to say to you is it’s only a problem if you are moaning and you’re choosing to live in that negative environment. If you’re not willing to change anything that needs to change, but you’re quite happily complaining about it, that’s very different to being able to talk honestly about what’s going on for you knowing that you’re ready to receive the power of talking to help you to work out the solutions for you to get out of that space.
You’re not living there.
They’re two very different things and I see them very differently, in that if you’re able to take constructive guidance, coaching, energy healing, even this comes from a friend and you’re willing to take it on board and change things as a result, that’s healthy. That’s constructive. I think the power of talking is really underrated because we have all these stigmas attached to it being bad or not being a good thing or you’re the one that’s always moaning or anything like that.
I say 'Bring it on!' providing you’re not prepared to live there and you’re open to suggestions and solutions coming your way!
A lot of this has come around the social media world that we’re in, magazines etc. painting these perfect pictures. I think on Facebook and other social media it’s even more powerful because these are the people we supposedly know who are popping the best bits out of their life. There are only pictures of when they’ve got beautiful makeup on and they’re fully made up. To be perfectly honest, you’ll see me made up and totally unmade up on my videos. That’s not because I don’t care about myself; I want to sometimes be completely natural. If I’m called to speak to you, even with no makeup on it will just happen. I’m not going to go and put a load of makeup on to be able to come on camera. Some people might say that’s totally unprofessional, but I’m here to completely promote being authentic. If the moment takes you and you want to talk and you don’t have makeup on, go talk without makeup on and have that confidence!
This only showing the best bits shows up in so many different ways as well. You often only see the amazing nights out. You only see the house when it’s tidy. You only see somebody’s car when it’s clean. But actually, there are all of those bits in between that we don’t always see on social media so we get this pretense that maybe our life isn’t perfect because we do have the mark on the floor or days without makeup or days when we don’t want to go out of the house or days when our cars are filthy.
We almost become afraid to share what we are and who we are as a person because of what we’re seeing in other people’s worlds, which makes it really conflicting for us to be able to do it. We hold back. We don’t feel we are good enough as we are in order to be able to be ourselves and share that without shame or guilt or worry that people might be judging or thinking differently of you.
It puts us into that comparisonitis mode which is never a good thing. It’s never a good thing when we’re looking at somebody else’s best bits according to how our messy life is right now. It’s really difficult for you to get out of it if you compare yourself to others. It is important that you’re able to get on track and stay completely true to what’s right and true for you. It might not be coming on live with no makeup on! It maybe something completely different. But all of those things that feel completely authentic for you, allow yourself to do them without shame. Be out and proud of who you are.
As women, as mums, as wives, as healers, therapists, whichever camp you’re in, as empaths as well, we are conditioned to take care of everybody else. It’s almost like a collective duty that that’s our role, our job. We take that on through nurture as well as nature, but that means as a result we tend to put everybody’s needs first. We don’t put our needs first at all. As a result of putting everybody else’s needs first, we then lose that sense of importance for ourselves, of taking care of ourselves. Even if it’s just five minutes a day, taking that time to take care of ourselves, but also to talk and communicate how we’re feeling. We maybe hear about everybody else’s day and everybody else’s challenges in life. We just soak it up like a sponge, but where and how do we then allow ours to outlet and to filter out?
As empaths as well, we’re so aware of everybody else’s pain and issues and the stuff they’ve got going on, that we don’t want to burden other people with our stuff because we feel like they’re already laden with their stuff. Again, we hold onto it instead. What happens as a result of holding onto all of these things is that our brain kind of goes into 'spaghetti mode'.
It’s just a mishmash of loads of tangled up thoughts and feelings and things that are just contained and stuck. As a result of them staying like spaghetti they are kind of knotted up and woven and interlinked. That often prevents us from being able to think clearly, from being able to manifest the things that we want, from having the focus and motivation to be able to take care of ourselves, to be able to communicate our thoughts clearly.
As a result of you not being to communicate your thoughts clearly if you bottle things up, the moment that bottle pops, there’ll just be this surge, this blurt of information that probably doesn’t make sense to anybody who might be listening but it’s you literally outletting that spaghetti in any way you possibly can.
Believe it or not, I am actually not a woman of many words! Four years ago, you’d never have caught me on a live. I was always the one that would sit in a room and be the one that listened. I would never be the one to speak. I would never be the one to talk and speak out. If somebody asked me a question, that would petrify me as to “Will the answer be wrong?”, even if it was a no right or wrong answer question. This is something that I have been able to practice and I’ve had to practice in order to be able to not only filter my thoughts to gain clarity, to boost my motivation, my creativity, my manifestation abilities, but also to communicate my feelings. To share my dreams, my challenges, my celebrations. That’s with friends, it’s with mentors, with my partner, coaches, and therapists.
The key thing is that I have been able to practice that action, to strengthen the muscle of talking, of communicating and sharing honestly.
It’s not as scary as you think when you do it!
We have so many fear-based experiences around it in the past, of maybe subconsciously having believed that we’ve been shut up or told off when we’ve said something that felt right and true for us and we’ve been criticised when we’ve achieved something we felt proud of and told it wasn’t good enough. All of those kinds of subconscious things that just stop us from speaking our truth in some way. It could be anything.
In my experience, some of the most magical and some of the most amazing things have happened when I have shared my hopes and my dreams and my aspirations with people. The most magical and amazing thing that happens is that they actually happen!
It’s beautiful to share, because when it stays up here in the mind, it’s just contained. But as soon as you are able to share it out loud, something shifts. Something changes and it starts to take on the path of making that happen and making that a reality.
My husband isn’t particularly spiritual. He is very open-minded. He’s extremely supportive of me. But on the times when I have the courage to be able to share something with him, no matter how big a goal it feels or how far away it feels, the power of that combination of me sharing that with him seems to do something really powerful.
I’m yet to put my finger on exactly what it is, but it’s different to when I share it with you or with a friend or with a coach. There’s just something unique about what manifests as a result of talking about that. I don’t know if it’s having that added support or having him in the same energy as me the majority of the day and supporting me with that, I don’t know. It’s something I’ve only fairly recently realised the pattern of how powerful that is when I share something with him and then all of a sudden it just seems to amplify the manifestation properties of it or the power of the change that I’m after.
How does not talking have an effect on your energy?
If you’re not able to verbalise or communicate or write down even what’s truly honestly on your mind, even if it’s not completely clear, if it’s confused, if it’s feeling a bit of a mishmash of thoughts, that resonates into your energy. If you are not able to put those on paper or not able to speak, they become trapped energies. When you are able to start to communicate with one person rather than a group of people, or somebody you really care about who is just totally non-judgmental who completely and unconditionally accepts you as you are, you will clear your energy. It is so powerful for allowing your chakras to balance and align for your energy to flow through receiving and giving as well. It gives you that opportunity to start to really bring yourself into balance with what you want as well as who you are and how you are as a person.
Gaining clarity of your thoughts:
When you are not able to communicate in written form or just be completely authentic with yourself, you have that spaghetti brain. It really is just a complete interwoven mishmash of words and thoughts and feelings. But when you are able to practice stretching and working that talking muscle, your communicating muscle, reaching out to people, sharing with people or writing your thoughts down, that spaghetti starts to get really orderly. It starts to create these wonderful patterns of flow that you can see, you can think thought processes all the way through. You can see how one thing can join to the next really clearly, whereas prior to being able to talk about it, it was maybe all over the place and a bit chaotic. Talking and communicating really helps you to clarify your thoughts and follow them through to fruition and being able to speak your mind clearly, eloquently and effortlessly.
Also, when you are able to say things out loud, you can get a real feel for how they feel in your body. If you are sharing an emotion or you are sharing something that’s coming up for you around a situation or you are just sharing something deep and meaningful with a friend, you get a real physical feeling in your body as to how that is making you feel. It will feel very clear. If it’s high vibration, if it feels good, it’s going to be a real excited, warm feeling. But if it is something that’s maybe feeling not right for you, not aligned for you, it might feel heavy. It might feel quite dark. It might feel quite sad or quite painful in your body. It really helps you to verbalise and feel all of those physical things as well when you communicate-you are literally connecting with your body in a mind, body and spirit way.
Let me stop here while you absorb why talking has extraordinary power for your ultimate health. I’ll continue this mindset mastermind in the next post, be sure to come back!
In the meantime if you have any questions to do with anything that we’ve talked about around talking, around the power of your words or anything, feel free to reach out or comment here. Let me know what questions you have around that. I’ll be happy to answer those for you!